मन्या आणि त्याची बायको सं’भो’ग करत असतात

Home मनोरंजन मराठी विनोद सामान्य ज्ञान

नमस्कार मंडळी,

कसे आहेत मजेत ना, हसताय ना, हसायलाच पाहिजे. कारण हसणे हे आरोग्यासाठी एकदम चांगले असते. हसल्याने माणसाची सर्व विचार आणि टेन्शन पळून जातात. तसेच आरोग्य हि उत्तम राहते. कोरोनामुळे आपण सर्व घरातच कैद झालोय आणि आयुष्य कस बोरं होऊन गेलेय. म्हणून तुम्हाला ह्या बोरं आयुष्यात मनोरंजन करण्यासाठी आम्ही काही विनोद आणले आहेत. ते वाचून तुम्हाला नकी हसू येईल आणि तुम्ही आनंदित व्हाल. चला तर मग वाचूया काही मराठी विनोद –

विनोद १ – एकदा बायको आपल्या नवऱ्याला सांगते कि शेजारची बाई आज म्हणत होती कि तिला
सेम टू सेम आपल्या चिंट्या सारखा मुलगा हवा आहे…..
नवरा: अगं मग त्यात काय बोलव तिला आज रात्री आपल्या घरी.. तिची इच्छा पूर्ण करू…..
(पूर्ण घरात शांती पसरते) पण थांबा थांबा विनोद इथेच संपला नाही आहे….
बायको: अहो पण मी तिला शेजारच्या रमेशच्या घरी जायला सांगितले… आता तर कायमचा सन्नाटा पसरला….
बायको : ऐकलंत का, आपली नवीन शेजारिण म्हणते की, तिला सेम आपल्या बंड्या सारखा मुलगा झाला पाहिजे… 😂😂😂

विनोद २- मी एकदा पुण्यात पाटी पाहिली…”आमच्या कडे गाईचे विशुद्ध तूप मिळेल”
मी विचारलं, “विशुद्ध म्हणजे?” उत्तर आलं, “विशेष शुद्ध..अति शुद्ध!”
मी पुन्हा विचारलं, “मग .. विझवणं म्हणजे काय?”. बाईंनी जोरात दरवाजा आपटला ना राव… (ज्याला समजला त्यांचीच हसा) 😂😂😂

विनोद ३- एकदा मुलगा आणि मुलगी प्रेमावर गप्पा मारत असतात…
मुलगी मुलाला हळूच विचारते- आपल्या दोघ्यांच्या प्रेमाबद्दल किती लोकांना माहिती आहे रे…
मुलगा- अगं फक्त ४ लोकांना आपल्या प्रेमाविषयी माहित आहे…!
मुलगी- कोण कोण रे?? मुलगा : एक तू…! एक मी…! एक मेडिकलवाला आणि एक लॅाज वाला…!!! 😂😂😂

विनोद ४- शेजारचे रामू काका : अरे मन्या, माझं एक काम कर ना???
मला ना एक सेल्फी स्टिक आणुन दे ना ?
मन्या : का हो काका सेल्फी स्टिक कशाला हवी ह्या वयात???
रामू काका :अरे बाबा मलाजरा मुळव्याध बघायचा होता…!!! 😂😂😂

विनोद ५- हा विनोद खूप चावट आहे… ज्याला चावट आवडतो त्यांचीच वाचा…. एकदा मन्या आणि त्याची बायको सं भोग करत असतात…..
मन्या बायकोला विचारतो – मज्जा येतेय का???? बायको: हो खूपच मज्जा येतेय….
खरं सांगू का मला आज ना खूप मजा येतेय .. तुम्ही आज एक्सट्रा डाॅ’टेड फ्ले’व्हर वाला आणला आहे का????
मन्या: एक्सट्रा डाॅ’टेड बि’टेड असं काही नाही वेडी .. उन्हाळयामुळे घामोळ्या झाल्यात… 😂😂😂

विनोद ६- गण्याची गर्लफ्रेंड त्याला खूप दिवसांनी फोन करते…. गर्लफ्रेंड: काय रे गण्या सध्या तू काय करतो?….
गण्या(खुश होऊन): हाय शोना आज इतक्या दिवसातून कशी आठवण आलील…
गर्लफ्रेंड: काही नाही रे गण्या.. भाजी घ्यायला बाजारात आली होती……
तिथे तोंडली बघुन तुझी आठवण आली… म्हणून फोन केला…!!! 😂😂😂

विनोद ७- एकदा दोन मैत्रिणीचे चावट संभाषण फोन वर सुरु असते…..!!!
पहिली मैत्रीण- काय ग तुझं कस चाललं आहे???? दुसरी मैत्रीण- काय सांगू ग तुला….!!! पहिली मैत्रीण- काय जाहला ग काही प्रॉब्लेम आहे का…!!!
दुसरी मैत्रीण- अग माझा नवरा उठला कि करतो… नास्ता झाला कि करतो…. अंघोळ झाली कि करतो….जेवण झाली कि करतो…. झोपताना सुद्धा करतो….
पहिली मैत्रीण- अग एवढं करून सुद्धा कंटाळा येत नाही का त्याला थकत नाही का तो???? दुसरी मैत्रीण- अगं कंटाळा आला कि परत करतो आणि थकवा आला तरी परत करतो…!!!!! 😂😂😂

विनोद ८- पिंटू: दुधात जास्त शक्ती असते का बि अर मध्ये ? चिंटू: बि यर मध्ये…!!!
पिंटू: ते कसे ? चिंटू: एक ग्लास दूध पिऊन पण भिंत नाही हलली.. पण एक बाटली बि यर
पिऊन फक्त तिच्याकडे बघितल्याने सुद्धा ती थर थर हालते… म्हणून बि यर जास्त शक्तिशाली असते….!!! 😂😂😂

विनोद ९- एकदा नवरा’बायको संभोग करण्यासाठी एक को’ड ठरवतात…
नवरा: “चल साखर खाऊ” हे बोलायचं जेव्हा आपल्याला सं’भो’ग करायची इच्छा होईल… (नोकराला हे कोड माहित पडत)
नोकराचं आणि मालकाच्या मुलीचं ल’फडं असत… नोकर आणि मुलगी सं’भो’ग करत असतात, अचानक मालक त्यांना बघतो आणि बोलतो
“सा’ल्या काय करतोय”? नोकर: मालक मी साखर खातो आहे…. मालक: सा’ल्या त्यासाठी नवीन साखरेची पोती (गोनटी ) का फोडली ?
जुनी साखरेची पोटी वापरायची ना… ज्याला समाजाला त्यांनीच हसा…. 😂😂😂

विनोद १०- दिराच्या सु.हा ग.रा.त्रीच्या वेळेस
बायको तिच्या नवऱ्याला – अहो, भाऊजींच्या रूममधून आवाज नाही येत आहे
नवरा हसला आणि बोलला – माझा भाऊ स्लो स्पिनर आहे आणि मी फास्ट बॉलर,
मी २ मिनिटात पीचची ऐसी की तैसी करून टाकतो
हे ऐकूनच बायको लाजली 😂😂😂

विनोद ११- सुहाग#रात्रीच्या वेळेस बायको नवऱ्याला
बायको : अहो मला खूप घबराहट होते आहे
नवरा: अगं तुझी आज पहिली रा😛त्र आहे म्हणून
बायको : नाही वो, रात्री पाहिल्यानदाच करते आहे ना म्हणून😆😛😅😂😂😂

कसे आहेत मजेत ना, हसताय ना, हसायलाच पाहिजे. कारण हसणे हे आरोग्यासाठी एकदम चांगले असते. हसल्याने माणसाची सर्व विचार आणि टेन्शन पळून जातात. तसेच आरोग्य हि उत्तम राहते. कोरोनामुळे आपण सर्व घरातच कैद झालोय आणि आयुष्य कस बोरं होऊन गेलेय. म्हणून तुम्हाला ह्या बोरं आयुष्यात मनोरंजन करण्यासाठी आम्ही काही विनोद आणले आहेत. ते वाचून तुम्हाला नकी हसू येईल आणि तुम्ही आनंदित व्हाल. चला तर मग वाचूया काही मराठी विनोद –

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